At last-a new weapon in the war
against the spread of COVID-19: the Oblivi-Ometer! This vital invention is guaranteed
to give accurate readings of any citizen’s self-delusion/ego-driven
resistance to recognizing the threat of a pandemic. And to do something about
it!
Some elements
of design remain classified, but we can reveal that the system was built utilizing loading
coils in parallel with reruns of Meet The Press to analyze the size of inauguration crowds. The Oblivio-Meter can now
penetrate even the thickest skulls and if the meter shows obliviousness
readings above a certain level, a shock from Central Headquarters can be
delivered, knocking some sense into the subject’s stupid cranium.
Don’t you just wish?
2 comments:
Love the idea of an oblivi-meter. Still needed here in Arlington as runners/bikers wearing no protective masks continue to huff and puff past well-masked walkers on the Minuteman bike trail...
Thanks, Will. The need for this device is widespread.
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